Why We Don’t Need To Keep Fighting Ourselves

I find myself writing this at 4.30 am having been awake since 3.30 am fighting in my mind. Have tried every technique I have to relax and fall back asleep, but to no avail, so the only other answer is to accept the need to get up, move around and then write, so I can return to peace. 

I am fighting with myself but what against?


I am going through an intense time of wonderful, amazing growth into a new level and expansion of myself and my abundance.

A whole new realm of being, doing and creating as me and living my dreams, that has brought up some old hindering beliefs of association between money, men and providing for myself financially and fully.

Some old social programming, that as a woman, I need a man to be wealthy and successful.

Old news that needs laughing at and releasing.

The answer is, of course, yes I can be prosperous with or without a man in my life – having a lover has nothing to do with money. Money has nothing to do with gender and I can do my own thing and be happy and wealthy. 

The content of my fighting is not the important bit, although it is hugely important for me and for what I talk and write about because I am not alone in needing to shake off that old collective consciousness.

fighting against or fighting for

I want to discuss the trap of fighting against and fighting for. 

The push against what is not working is resistance and creates more resistance. In this case, I could fight against men and feel indignation and I’ll prove you wrong –blah blah blah… The fight manifests more fights.

This need to push against is a normal human developmental phase when we are teenagers to break free of our parents.

However, we can get psychologically or habitually stuck there believing we have to keep fighting against someone or something to be free, as though we are still children or victims of imprisonment. 

If I kill the problem, the person or object!

I am then free for the new and more!

Whereas fighting for something is considered valiant, a hero against injustice and for the common good, but in vibration and communication to the Universe, it is the same resistance and mostly based on trying to prove we are good.

This comes from being a toddler, when we are naturally desiring to walk, to talk, to express ourselves and be heard and seen and have control, but feel in our environment that we have to fight to achieve it.

more of the same or is it time for different

Fight and you only create more fight…

The desire we feel in those developmental phases for growth, expansion, our space, individuality, new and more is natural and innate.

The method of fighting for it is social conditioning, founded on being in an environment and modelling of behaviour from others who had a poverty belief of not enough. Creating a struggle and hard work mindset, fighting and pushing for survival. 

I Choose To Thrive

No matter what our earliest experiences or how others perceive the world, there comes a point when we need to move into our own personal thriving and therefore create real lasting improvements for future generations.

To do that we need to alter our mindset to a prosperous mindset, which is based on trust and promotes allowing, accepting, receiving, creating and sharing.

We can then create change without having to fight and struggle to give it some extra value. The love, passion and power that flows through those thoughts and actions from that mindset is rich, potent, buoyant and filled with satisfaction. 

As the Law Of Attraction attracts like unto itself, it will keep bringing more of the same, and growth can unfold with ease, abundance and solutions, even when faced with other peoples poverty mindset and struggle.

the universe is a bigger opponent – You better let it win

There is a time for play fighting and place for building physical stamina – just don’t bother fighting against the Universe. The Universe is bigger and more powerful, but you are also the Universe, so it is simply a fight against yourself!

Get into this groove of an abundance mindset and the Universe will line you up with other people who think the same and want to help in making positive growth and change for all. It becomes a WIN/WIN.

No longer a fight against good and evil, wrong or right…

Instead just expand into more…

We can fight on a small level in our minds as we get wrapped up with drama at work or in our family. Or we do it when we are wanting to make a move into a new job and out of a relationship. We create more and more resistance and struggle to justify it and give it meaning.

When all we have to do is accept is that it does or doesn’t feel good to us and follow our own emotions – our own personal GPS for life and prosperity. Trust in ourselves and get in the right groove – get into a trusting, open mindset to allow the adventure of life to unfold as we feel our way into being more and more.

we are already free

This way of allowing and accepting does not come easy…

It is the path of least resistance and when you’re on it, it feels easy and wonderful and you won’t want to stop as you experience the power of the Universe and love.

However, it is deeply entrenched in our psychologically immature societies and collective consciousness where we constantly reaffirm a belief about struggle, the hero fighting and that nothing has meaning without hard work.

Fighting for our dreams and freedom, as though we are all stuck in some prison, but the prison is of our own making!

We are the only one’s who can release ourselves from it!

As one person takes off the veil and allows the truth of their own power and freedom already, and worthiness now, to be in the flow, we not only inspire others but an effect the collective field and lighten the peer pressure and show a different way of being that resonates to our core selves.

trusting yourself

We can mature into our power and no longer stay behaving like children fighting to be heard and seen — even by ourselves. All we have to do is become a little more self-aware of our emotions and wellbeing.

Take small steps every day to let go, surrender, allow and accept  – to trust, relax and believe in something bigger inside of ourselves and the Universe that surrounds us.

Suspend our need to paddle upstream and just go with the flow in our mind and bodies.

Start to notice when it feels like you are fighting internally and externally and take a moment to take deep breaths, step away, write, stand out in nature, do exercise, meditate or do yoga — whatever it takes to get you back to yourself and calm and open. 

Only you know and can feel what really works best for you to feel like you are home once more, relax in your easy vibe and energise to move forward.

So play and explore to find your best alignment tools…

When you start to get into the consistent abundant groove you will become more aware of all the messages of poverty, lack, unworthiness mindset and how much we value struggle and fighting for freedom.

As you begin to feel your own independent worth and freedom, not beholden to anyone or anything, you will also start to see a whole new world and way of being — a kind of heaven on earth.

What was once magic or luck before, is simply flowing with the Universe, letting it win to help you, instead of fighting it. 

focus your energy – don’t waste it

Now I’m not saying there won’t be times of focus and learning new skills, as you take them to a new level and focus on what gives you most personal pleasure and satisfaction.

The urge to fight will raise its head as you continue to grow, that’s OK, the important thing is that you notice it as futile and a waste of your energy and holding you apart for what you want. So you might as well give up and accept your true power instead.

As a former professional spokeswoman, I am not averse to taking massive action and focusing on what I desire. I just believe in working smart.

Taking efficient inspired action to achieve optimum results and practice.

Simply put — Using the power of the Universe and the Law of Attraction to maximise my best results – good feelings, satisfaction and positive outcome.

When we stop wasting our energy of false fighting and move into mentally thriving prosperously, then life simply becomes more FUN.

An exciting adventure and positive challenge to continually develop who we are and a life and world that feels most satisfying to us.


If you’ve been intrigued by this article, then the Universe is answering you. It knows you are ready for MORE LOVE, accepting your self-worth and embracing an abundance of LOVE in your life and relationships.

Then click the heading above to check out The Big Book of Love and put The LOVE back into Your Life. 

Much Love

Jo xx

Love Psychologist, Relationship Therapist, Love Energy Healer and Author


  1. Angela Ferguson on January 16, 2019 at 6:42 pm

    Exactly where I am right now.. Down to being awake at 3.30, 4.30, 5.30…Thanks for sharing x

  2. Ann on January 18, 2019 at 3:53 am

    Wow wow you are a blessing, this is what I needed so bad. God knows what you need when you need it so thank you so much..This is what I been struggling with for a couple of years fighting with the universe that keeps telling me to surrender and its been so hard to trust and do that so full of fear of letting go and now I feel like I wished I would have listened because I could have saved myself alot of craziness…thank you..

  3. Jo Warwick on January 18, 2019 at 9:54 am

    Thank you so much for sharing and your feedback – Im glad this can help you on your journey forward, it doesnt matter where you’ve been before! xx

  4. Jo Warwick on January 18, 2019 at 9:55 am

    Thank you for your comment and I get it – the timing thing is exhausting but hopefully this will guide you to let go and surrender so you can rest and have clarity xx